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Play the "Michael Vick" Game Today!

Friday, August 31st, 2007 5:00 am by RCW

Michael Vick's FriendThe “Michael Vick” Road Trip Game is really simple and quite fun. It’s the perfect game for you and your family to play while stuck on that long drive this Labor Day weekend. It’s also a game that you and your co-workers can enjoy while driving to lunch on Fridays. We also recommend this unique game to all the “Soccer Moms” out there who have the daunting task of taxi-ing a bunch of whiny brats all over the place.

HOW TO PLAY:

During the drive, whenever someone is lucky enough to see a mangled carcass of some barely identifiable animal smeared on the highway (or its adjacent landscape), they should emphatically point at the carcass while simultaneously yelling at the top of their lungs: “Michael Vick’s Friend!!!”. Whoever was the FIRST to yell it out coherently gets points. Simple enough for you?

POINT SYSTEM:

Seven points should be awarded for a pitbull carcass, six points for all other dogs, and three points for all other animals. There should be a two point deduction for anyone who mistakenly yells out Michael Vick’s Friend!” when spotting something like a piece of clothing or trash lying in the middle of the road. A deduction of six points should also be assessed if the wrong name is yelled; for instance “Donovan McNabb’s Friend!”. At the end of the drive, tally the points; whoever has the most points at the end of the trip wins.

PRIZES:

A prize can be awarded to the “eagle-eyed” kid or grownup who spots the most “friends”. Now, the prize can be anything: money, bragging-rites, an extra serving of mashed potatoes, etc. But, since we love irony here at OTD, we suggest that the grand prize be a Michael Vick jersey, collegiate or professional.

The OFFICIAL RULES of the “Michael Vick” Road Trip Game:
  1. The game must be played inside a vehicle with a licensed and sober driver at the wheel.
  2. Whoever points out a carcass first and yells “Michael Vick’s Friend!”, clearly and correctly, gets points awarded.
    • 7 points : a pitbull carcass (if not 100% sure, only award 6 points)
    • 6 points : a dog (non-pitbull) carcass (if not 100% sure, only award 3 points)
    • 3 points : an animal (non-dog) carcass
    • 2 points : only award two points if the person says the phrase instead of yelling it loudly
  3. Whoever incorrectly yells “Michael Vick’s Friend!” gets points deducted or ejected from the game.
    • -2 points : a non-carcass (i.e. trash, clothing, a rag doll, a living dog, etc.)
    • -6 points : wrong NFL quarterback’s name or mispronunciation (i.e. Daunte Culpepper, Steve McNair, Mike Vick, etc.)
    • Ejection from the game : eject a player after 3 penalties; this number can be set higher or lower
      (Remember, one of the biggest fears a player should have is the fear of being “left out” of all the fun)
  4. If a human carcass is spotted, the game should be “delayed” until the call to 911 is finished. Out of respect for the body, NO points shall be awarded or deducted if the phrase “Michael Vick’s Friend!” is invoked.
  5. Each player can keep track of his or her own score based on an “honor system”. However, OTD does suggest that points be tallied and calculated by one person who can be deemed the “scorekeeper“; this person shall not be retarded.
  6. At the end of the trip (or a set number of trips), the person with the most points shall be deemed the official WINNER.

WARNING: This game is not intended for the driver of the vehicle to play. However, you can secretly play and keep score in your head while you drive…like I do. Sorry driver, it’s just too dangerous - you may end up a ghost rising above your own carcass as a minivan full of kids passes by yelling, “Michael Vick’s Friend!”

**Editor’s Note** - While watching the show MonsterQuest on the History Channel, I noticed that the picture of the “dog” we used for this post was actually a supposed monster canine. The photo was featured prominently on the episode Mutant Canines1 which aired December 5, 2007.

OfferOfTheDay.com is interested in hearing about your experiences playing this game. Please add your comments.

  1. Mans best friend is many times our last line of defense. But something strange is killing Fido. In 2006, a rash of pets were killed in Maine and Minnesota by a beast locals describe as a mutant. But there are more than just stories, a creature was hit by a car and the body was found. This strange looking creature will be DNA tested to see what it really is. And two MonsterQuest winter expeditions will be launched to trap other dog killers still at large. [^]
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8 USER COMMENTS:

By Listat on 08/31/2007 at 5:15 am -

Wow….speechless.

By Mike Vik on 08/31/2007 at 8:18 am -

You guys are a bunch of jerks! I like that, since I’m one too. I’m gonna secretly play this game and yell my own name while pointing at dead animals.

By ryadmin on 08/31/2007 at 9:08 am - <- Administrator

My brother and I started a rendition of this game during a recent rafting trip. We then polished out the absurdities and offered it to the public. I also play a slightly different game, by myself of course, when watching “Forensic Files”, “American Justice”, or “Cold Case” on A&E…whenever I see a murdered blonde woman in the show, I point to the screen and say “OJ’s Wife!!!” in my head.

By BigUnz on 09/01/2007 at 11:41 am -

Nice game! I think i’ll drive my family to Hillsboro this weekend while playing the M.V. game. I hope to see at least 2 dead deer carcasses.

By admin on 09/02/2007 at 9:09 pm - <- Administrator

BigUnz wrote:

Nice game! I think i’ll drive my family to Hillsboro this weekend while playing the M.V. game. I hope to see at least 2 dead deer carcasses.

2 dead dear = 6 whopping points; probably enough to keep you in the game!

By tim on 12/05/2007 at 1:26 pm -

what if the dog is a pitbull/ other dog mix but mostly pitbull. I need to know i have won 5 straight and if this counts i win by a point

By ryadmin on 12/05/2007 at 2:11 pm - <- Administrator

tim wrote:

what if the dog is a pitbull/ other dog mix but mostly pitbull. I need to know i have won 5 straight and if this counts i win by a point

tim, I consider a dog of at least a quarter pitbull blood to be pitbull. So atleast the “grandfather” or “grandmother” of the dog in question should be pitbull. If this is the case, go ahead and award yourself that extra point. But you’ve got to be absolutely sure…no cheaters in this game.

By sally on 08/27/2009 at 11:05 am -

i would yell out everyone has hit a dog… so that is meant for everyone of all race, age and color…
Leave this shit alone and get a life… you people are sick as all get out…

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